P R O F I L E.
Amanda
19
exTPS.exAHS.
TemasekPoly.BIO
Amanda
19
exTPS.exAHS.
TemasekPoly.BIO
T A L K S.
P A S T.
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Monday, July 31, 2006
"what u resist, persists."
that's a line from jennifer aniston. quite true.. lol.
went for another torture session in the morn (CGH). no sch today cos of the esplanade concert ytd. told me my knee is a lil swollen.. not supposed to run, jump or climb stairs.. den how am i supposed to get around?? haha.. anyways, NAPFA on this thursday.. how how?? he cant exempt me from it.. only the doctor can(SGH).. i just shrugged. haha.. hmm.. need to go back on wed to do the ultrasound treatment after sch.. i still dun quite get how it works actually.. lol. but at least it relieved some pain earlier on.. lol. so, gotta continue with NAPFA.. n the 2.4km.. man it's gonna aggravate my knee.. o well.
i just like to ask "why not?" when ppl ask "why?" haha.. seriously, why not? =)
life's a buzz. complicated yet to the extent of interesting. depends how u choose to look at it.
life rocks =) haha.. esp when it's such a precious gift. that's rite.. it's a gift. rmb when there was this show that circled, "yesterday's history, tomorrow's a mystery and today's a gift. that's why we call it the present."
"life = yesterday+tomorrow+today" = "life = history+mystery+gift" just a simple equation. and surprise surprise! gift's in the equation! and everybody goes, "wow!" lol. okies.. that was cold. nevertheless, note! GIFT IS IN YOUR LIFE!
just came up with this.. G.I.F.T = "God Is For Thee" so imagine, every minute of your life, it has a sure chance of becoming the future, the present and the past. today = every moment that you live, and today is also a gift! so, it just simply means that God is for you everyday =)
went for another torture session in the morn (CGH). no sch today cos of the esplanade concert ytd. told me my knee is a lil swollen.. not supposed to run, jump or climb stairs.. den how am i supposed to get around?? haha.. anyways, NAPFA on this thursday.. how how?? he cant exempt me from it.. only the doctor can(SGH).. i just shrugged. haha.. hmm.. need to go back on wed to do the ultrasound treatment after sch.. i still dun quite get how it works actually.. lol. but at least it relieved some pain earlier on.. lol. so, gotta continue with NAPFA.. n the 2.4km.. man it's gonna aggravate my knee.. o well.
i just like to ask "why not?" when ppl ask "why?" haha.. seriously, why not? =)
life's a buzz. complicated yet to the extent of interesting. depends how u choose to look at it.
life rocks =) haha.. esp when it's such a precious gift. that's rite.. it's a gift. rmb when there was this show that circled, "yesterday's history, tomorrow's a mystery and today's a gift. that's why we call it the present."
"life = yesterday+tomorrow+today" = "life = history+mystery+gift" just a simple equation. and surprise surprise! gift's in the equation! and everybody goes, "wow!" lol. okies.. that was cold. nevertheless, note! GIFT IS IN YOUR LIFE!
just came up with this.. G.I.F.T = "God Is For Thee" so imagine, every minute of your life, it has a sure chance of becoming the future, the present and the past. today = every moment that you live, and today is also a gift! so, it just simply means that God is for you everyday =)
Sunday, July 30, 2006
[IN YOUR NAME, FOR YOUR NAME]
i cant stop saying how happy and free i am! haha.. i'm like going bonkers soon.. haha.. really thankful for these encounters with God. it feels good to be free.. it feels great =) the ministering session was just awesome. thankful for such a powerful man and women of God to lay hands n pray for me too =) it was truely awesome. the breath that just struck me so instantaneously.. the newfound peace and joy.. being filled with the spirit =) i'm glad that i wasnt as violent as i thought i'd be.. =x lol. it was tiring.. just praying would make my legs go all jelly n just collaspe there..
like anyone would expect, there was a lot of struggling and shouting and screaming.. not forgeting the vomiting.. there was once i had to catch this person in front of me.. it was really tough man.. she was really struggling and turning.. caught her head to prevent herself from hitting the floor when she struggled. the look in her eyes was like scary.. she looked of out sorts.. even when the sister who was praying for her ask her to make eye contact, she was like in another world.. was like sort of staring at me summore.. supported her head for awhile until she calmed down.. could see ppl just slain all around.
really thankful =) PTL!
like anyone would expect, there was a lot of struggling and shouting and screaming.. not forgeting the vomiting.. there was once i had to catch this person in front of me.. it was really tough man.. she was really struggling and turning.. caught her head to prevent herself from hitting the floor when she struggled. the look in her eyes was like scary.. she looked of out sorts.. even when the sister who was praying for her ask her to make eye contact, she was like in another world.. was like sort of staring at me summore.. supported her head for awhile until she calmed down.. could see ppl just slain all around.
really thankful =) PTL!
Saturday, July 29, 2006
[what do you want to be filled with? it's ur choice.. it's ur call.]
it's a time like this when i'm not to be trifled with.. i'm sry.
pls give me some time..
the weather changes so instantaneously... being literal here. no link anyway.
o wells.. i'm off to lala~ land.
it's a time like this when i'm not to be trifled with.. i'm sry.
pls give me some time..
the weather changes so instantaneously... being literal here. no link anyway.
o wells.. i'm off to lala~ land.
Thursday, July 27, 2006
it's like that.. just like that.
anyway, was reading entries of the teary investiture.. it was truely a once in a lifetime experience =) and i'm glad to be able to experience it. missed out on the investiture as i was sick.. but nevertheless.. =) RnE has been great man.. all the suaning, the painting times.. laughter.. tempers.. all the these and thats.. a true family=) go thru crap together and everything.. good times.. not so good times.. long times (that gigantic gameboard).. shouting times(in the cafe taking orders). it has been a blast. a great blast =) able to come across this emo bunch of ppl and have a SNAG as a comm head.. haha! my "dear".. hahaha! my poor "dear" who's always suan-ed by me.. lol.. btw, BIO ROCKS! (if u read this) haha.. not forgetting all the other darlings.. some, shout shout scold scold until laugh or cry.. i see already also duno whether to laugh or cry.. lol. gonna miss them.. ok lar.. i know that i haven been around much lately but, I LOVE YOU GUYS LOADS! i wish i could watch the investiture video.. anyone??
still aint in very good condition.. walked home from tuition with freezing hands that apparently turned white.. o.O almost to the point of numbness.. n the weather was like super hot?! sigh.. i think she was kinda exasperated.. my brain was seriously not functioning.. i mean, i was literally working the qns out in my head, but i could write nothing out! nonsense rite?? working out everything in my head, but not able to write it out?! rubbish. but that was wad happened.. i also duno why.. nor can i explain it.. just cant establish the link.
the atmosphere has suddenly just changed. just like that. wad's going on.. anyone?
JTKY, stop wondering who the guy is ok? tks. =) haha..
(眼再天边，竟在眼前。）LOL.
anyway, was reading entries of the teary investiture.. it was truely a once in a lifetime experience =) and i'm glad to be able to experience it. missed out on the investiture as i was sick.. but nevertheless.. =) RnE has been great man.. all the suaning, the painting times.. laughter.. tempers.. all the these and thats.. a true family=) go thru crap together and everything.. good times.. not so good times.. long times (that gigantic gameboard).. shouting times(in the cafe taking orders). it has been a blast. a great blast =) able to come across this emo bunch of ppl and have a SNAG as a comm head.. haha! my "dear".. hahaha! my poor "dear" who's always suan-ed by me.. lol.. btw, BIO ROCKS! (if u read this) haha.. not forgetting all the other darlings.. some, shout shout scold scold until laugh or cry.. i see already also duno whether to laugh or cry.. lol. gonna miss them.. ok lar.. i know that i haven been around much lately but, I LOVE YOU GUYS LOADS! i wish i could watch the investiture video.. anyone??
still aint in very good condition.. walked home from tuition with freezing hands that apparently turned white.. o.O almost to the point of numbness.. n the weather was like super hot?! sigh.. i think she was kinda exasperated.. my brain was seriously not functioning.. i mean, i was literally working the qns out in my head, but i could write nothing out! nonsense rite?? working out everything in my head, but not able to write it out?! rubbish. but that was wad happened.. i also duno why.. nor can i explain it.. just cant establish the link.
the atmosphere has suddenly just changed. just like that. wad's going on.. anyone?
JTKY, stop wondering who the guy is ok? tks. =) haha..
(眼再天边，竟在眼前。）LOL.
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
food for thought: why do ppl only realise for themselves how fragile life is, when there are already so many examples out there?
often you hear, for example, "cancer changed how she saw life". most of the time, it has to happen on that person before he/she gets a revelation. cant one already realise from the different life stories told?? isnt it already sumthing to think about?? it doesnt have to happen to oneself to know rite??
another thing i dun quite get, and wish to be enlightened about.. why is it that people cant go back to basics on medicine? i mean, yes, we need to modify medication as the pathogen may have already been immuned to it.. but, is this pathogen also immuned to what its past generations of many have been exposed to? is it possible that the very first type of medication be the answer to coming up with more complicated types?? would it work that way? mutation of the pathogen has occurred, yes. but does this mean that this pathogen is also immuned to the basics as well? or not??
think about it.
often you hear, for example, "cancer changed how she saw life". most of the time, it has to happen on that person before he/she gets a revelation. cant one already realise from the different life stories told?? isnt it already sumthing to think about?? it doesnt have to happen to oneself to know rite??
another thing i dun quite get, and wish to be enlightened about.. why is it that people cant go back to basics on medicine? i mean, yes, we need to modify medication as the pathogen may have already been immuned to it.. but, is this pathogen also immuned to what its past generations of many have been exposed to? is it possible that the very first type of medication be the answer to coming up with more complicated types?? would it work that way? mutation of the pathogen has occurred, yes. but does this mean that this pathogen is also immuned to the basics as well? or not??
think about it.
it's 2am now.
i should be sleeping.
but i feel like puking.
nothing to puke and it's keeping me awake.
argh.
i'm tired.
i've never felt so tired for some time already.
it feels so terrible.
i wanna cry already.
Lord, help me.. heal me please.
talk about longsuffering.
i feel so problematic. =(
i should be sleeping.
but i feel like puking.
nothing to puke and it's keeping me awake.
argh.
i'm tired.
i've never felt so tired for some time already.
it feels so terrible.
i wanna cry already.
Lord, help me.. heal me please.
talk about longsuffering.
i feel so problematic. =(
Tuesday, July 25, 2006
it snapped. snapped in the night. i gotta spend what i dun really have now.. =( my poor guitar string..
Monday, July 24, 2006
i din know she's malaysian PR.. o.O her birthday today too.. kinda surprise that she nv go out? maybe after.. o well.. had tuition just now.
din go sch.. dreadful stomach flu.. bahh.. lol. nearly fainted when i went to see the doctor this morn.. so light headed and giddy.. almost the same thing. felt super weak too. the doc kinda freaked me a lil.. he was like super serious when he told me that my blood pressure was very very low.. i mean, how low can it get?? din ask him lar.. got a couple more of different medication. still feeling very weak now.. but, i think it was worse yesterday, early in the morn..
when i was having bs, i couldnt really focus.. focus with regards to my vision.. imagine that u are stoning at a page with words.. the words are like very blur n everything rite? that's wad i saw when i tried to focus reading the bible yesterday morn. i was desperately straining to see n read out the verses.. lol. and amazingly, i managed to do it even though it was extremely fuzzy.. haha.. half guessing the words =x thru the whole service, i was worrying if i'd suddenly throw up.. thank God that i din.. =)
off i go.. pray for me.. feel so weak.. =s
din go sch.. dreadful stomach flu.. bahh.. lol. nearly fainted when i went to see the doctor this morn.. so light headed and giddy.. almost the same thing. felt super weak too. the doc kinda freaked me a lil.. he was like super serious when he told me that my blood pressure was very very low.. i mean, how low can it get?? din ask him lar.. got a couple more of different medication. still feeling very weak now.. but, i think it was worse yesterday, early in the morn..
when i was having bs, i couldnt really focus.. focus with regards to my vision.. imagine that u are stoning at a page with words.. the words are like very blur n everything rite? that's wad i saw when i tried to focus reading the bible yesterday morn. i was desperately straining to see n read out the verses.. lol. and amazingly, i managed to do it even though it was extremely fuzzy.. haha.. half guessing the words =x thru the whole service, i was worrying if i'd suddenly throw up.. thank God that i din.. =)
off i go.. pray for me.. feel so weak.. =s
Sunday, July 23, 2006
yesterday was the longest time that i've slept in ages.. 10hrs.. seriously, when was the last time?? lol.. went to bed at 8pm.. that's like super duper early! haha.. miracle =) thank God for giving me rest.. it felt so good and i really needed it..
i think i should stop taking that particular medicine.. lol. imagine giddy+nausea+drowsy.. ARGH. haha.. n medicine's supposed to make u better.. lol. how ironic. seriously felt like fainting on my way for cell yesterday.. disorientated.. very much so. actually, even now, i feel disorientated.. when i get up n walk that is.. bahh.. haha.
i think today's message was really for someone.. it applies to a certain extent to people in relationships.. not just married.
i'm glad =) for favor of man and open heavens =) my prospect took the initiative to msg me today.. i was kinda caught unaware at first.. but nevertheless, i'm glad that she trusts me enough to share. Praise God! =D
i think i should stop taking that particular medicine.. lol. imagine giddy+nausea+drowsy.. ARGH. haha.. n medicine's supposed to make u better.. lol. how ironic. seriously felt like fainting on my way for cell yesterday.. disorientated.. very much so. actually, even now, i feel disorientated.. when i get up n walk that is.. bahh.. haha.
i think today's message was really for someone.. it applies to a certain extent to people in relationships.. not just married.
i'm glad =) for favor of man and open heavens =) my prospect took the initiative to msg me today.. i was kinda caught unaware at first.. but nevertheless, i'm glad that she trusts me enough to share. Praise God! =D
Saturday, July 22, 2006
tuition yesterday nearly became a debate session.. lol. woohoo! kinematics is gonna be done soon..
surpise surprise.. gastric flu.. hai.. lol. horrible feeling... but oddly, it din start with me sneezing.. normally, that would be the case.. o wells. medicine tastes horribly sweet and makes me horribly drowsy and giddy... not to mention nausea too.. blegh. i'm really afraid that i'd throw up.. argh. so xin ku..
oh! i forgot to mention another unwelcoming experience.. tried the standing broad jump on thurs and when landed, both my knees went with a LOUD CRACK! yikes! should i even be taking NAPHA?? a bit too late to ask my physio since i see him only the week after that.. lol. NAPHA's next wk!! time seriously flies...
man.. i feel kinda disorientated rite now.. gonna throw up le.. =(
surpise surprise.. gastric flu.. hai.. lol. horrible feeling... but oddly, it din start with me sneezing.. normally, that would be the case.. o wells. medicine tastes horribly sweet and makes me horribly drowsy and giddy... not to mention nausea too.. blegh. i'm really afraid that i'd throw up.. argh. so xin ku..
oh! i forgot to mention another unwelcoming experience.. tried the standing broad jump on thurs and when landed, both my knees went with a LOUD CRACK! yikes! should i even be taking NAPHA?? a bit too late to ask my physio since i see him only the week after that.. lol. NAPHA's next wk!! time seriously flies...
man.. i feel kinda disorientated rite now.. gonna throw up le.. =(
Thursday, July 20, 2006
my neck hurts so very very much.. must be due to leaning forward for a long period of time.. ouch. anyways, it was basically movie day today. esp for the express chinese peeps. they even watched movies during chinese lesson.. come to think of it, it was in a row summore.. elit, chinese and followed by SS lesson. wow. never quite thought that watching shows can be equally tiring.. haha.. reached home and math-ed while eating.. den went for math tuition.. i'm horrendous at graphs! linking n plotting i mean.. boo.. =( haha..
i think that everyday's great man.. of cos there are ups n downs.. but on the whole, life's great. thank God =) waking up each day, the first thing on my list - praising and thanking God. it makes a whole lot of difference.. there would be times where we would find ourselves dreading to get out of bed.. sure. not wanting to face the world that's a disaster.. well, you've gotta accept sumthing before you can change it.. did this chinese compre today.. basically it's trying to get people to be contented with what one has. this world as it is, extremely ironic. ppl wanna hold on to tradition and improve at the same time.. as an article on the government n people of singapore mentioned, people in developed countries seem to be less happy than those who live simple lives.. (developing countries.. man it's gett geographical..) anyway, it also mentioned that the gov has to handle the expectations of the growing nation.. that's inevitable of cos.. everyone, esp the gov wants to move ahead.. but sumtimes, they say we complain too much.. i dun quite agree with it.. if a suggestion is included, do you count it as a complaint?? well, i guess complains or not, it's most probably an issue that needs to be dealt with anyway.. for betterment or oppose, that's another story.. ironic country eh? when ppl speak up/out, the gov shoots them done.. in a sense.. suggesting that there's no other way/solution to whatever.. this is how it's done and that it shall be.. on the other hand, they say that singaporeans are passive.. we all wonder.. lol. even a kid know's.. that's how funny people can be.. lol. if it's sumthing they dun like to hear, they try all kinds of ways to shut the other party.. o.O humans are basically like that.. defensive.. it's instinct. i'm not referring to singapore only of cos.. it's almost the same everywhere.
man, i seriously like to argue bout these sort of things.. anyone interested?? hahaha.. it's quite fun actually.. note, it's not shooting the gov or anyone.. "freedom" of speech and thoughts.. that's all. though that doesnt really apply to sg rite?? o wells.. haha.. just an overview of human behaviour.. lol. intriguing.. enticing. =p
okies.. i need to tok to someone..
i think that everyday's great man.. of cos there are ups n downs.. but on the whole, life's great. thank God =) waking up each day, the first thing on my list - praising and thanking God. it makes a whole lot of difference.. there would be times where we would find ourselves dreading to get out of bed.. sure. not wanting to face the world that's a disaster.. well, you've gotta accept sumthing before you can change it.. did this chinese compre today.. basically it's trying to get people to be contented with what one has. this world as it is, extremely ironic. ppl wanna hold on to tradition and improve at the same time.. as an article on the government n people of singapore mentioned, people in developed countries seem to be less happy than those who live simple lives.. (developing countries.. man it's gett geographical..) anyway, it also mentioned that the gov has to handle the expectations of the growing nation.. that's inevitable of cos.. everyone, esp the gov wants to move ahead.. but sumtimes, they say we complain too much.. i dun quite agree with it.. if a suggestion is included, do you count it as a complaint?? well, i guess complains or not, it's most probably an issue that needs to be dealt with anyway.. for betterment or oppose, that's another story.. ironic country eh? when ppl speak up/out, the gov shoots them done.. in a sense.. suggesting that there's no other way/solution to whatever.. this is how it's done and that it shall be.. on the other hand, they say that singaporeans are passive.. we all wonder.. lol. even a kid know's.. that's how funny people can be.. lol. if it's sumthing they dun like to hear, they try all kinds of ways to shut the other party.. o.O humans are basically like that.. defensive.. it's instinct. i'm not referring to singapore only of cos.. it's almost the same everywhere.
man, i seriously like to argue bout these sort of things.. anyone interested?? hahaha.. it's quite fun actually.. note, it's not shooting the gov or anyone.. "freedom" of speech and thoughts.. that's all. though that doesnt really apply to sg rite?? o wells.. haha.. just an overview of human behaviour.. lol. intriguing.. enticing. =p
okies.. i need to tok to someone..
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
a lil recap bout yesterday.. the physio part that is.. lol. okies.. as i mentioned, it was torture! haha.. did like super loads of different activities till my shoulder area's aching like nobody's business.. lol. oh, did this few knee exercise as well.. i nearly couldnt get out of the gym after that.. seriously.. i'm discouraged.. of cos.. but not gonna let that affect =) yep yep. so, was basically hobbling out of the physio department.. wincing. LOL. how nice eh? sense the sarcasm.. lol. =p
tuition today.. relatively ok =) i'm getting the hang of math? Praise God =) i managed to pass my 2 recent math tests! it's a miracle for me.. really.. thank God.. the most amazing thing is that i'm starting to like it? yea.. haha.. also gotta thank lili too of cos.. i think i've like made her "peng" a couple of times.. lol. =x oops.. haha.. got cheated today.. by my chinese teacher.. lol. she told me and caiyu to go find her after sch to take chinese test.. in the end, she was no where to be found! wahh... not at her desk.. call her hp and all we got was, "the M1 customer you called is currently unavailable..." haha.. we went like, " what the.. " o wells.. heard that she went for meeting?! sumtimes, teachers are just too busy.. lol.
hmm.. this sat's founder's day.. and the whole thing is supposed to end ard 12 or 12.30?? how.. if that's the timing they give, you can definitely trust to sch to release us later than that.. there was only once in my 4yrs in AHS that miraculously, we ended early! but that was like only ONCE. lol.. pray that it'll end early, say ard 12pm.. hopefully.. otherwise, wad am i to do?? rush down?? how how?? i'd be disrupting if we end late and i rush down.. hmm..
i'm fearing that sumthing i dun want to happen will happen..
i need to renew my mind. i need to renew my mind. i need to renew my mind.
tuition today.. relatively ok =) i'm getting the hang of math? Praise God =) i managed to pass my 2 recent math tests! it's a miracle for me.. really.. thank God.. the most amazing thing is that i'm starting to like it? yea.. haha.. also gotta thank lili too of cos.. i think i've like made her "peng" a couple of times.. lol. =x oops.. haha.. got cheated today.. by my chinese teacher.. lol. she told me and caiyu to go find her after sch to take chinese test.. in the end, she was no where to be found! wahh... not at her desk.. call her hp and all we got was, "the M1 customer you called is currently unavailable..." haha.. we went like, " what the.. " o wells.. heard that she went for meeting?! sumtimes, teachers are just too busy.. lol.
hmm.. this sat's founder's day.. and the whole thing is supposed to end ard 12 or 12.30?? how.. if that's the timing they give, you can definitely trust to sch to release us later than that.. there was only once in my 4yrs in AHS that miraculously, we ended early! but that was like only ONCE. lol.. pray that it'll end early, say ard 12pm.. hopefully.. otherwise, wad am i to do?? rush down?? how how?? i'd be disrupting if we end late and i rush down.. hmm..
i'm fearing that sumthing i dun want to happen will happen..
i need to renew my mind. i need to renew my mind. i need to renew my mind.
Tuesday, July 18, 2006
_ él lastimar. _ él verdadero lastimar. _
again, the translation aint that good.. but nevertheless.. lol. and another thing that i've been seeing everywhere.. "we are a part.. not apart."
THE POWER OF CHOICE.
wow. honestly, i'm wow-ed by the mere sentence itself. it's sumthing that we all have and most of us abuse or abuse most of the time. true enough. there's no such thing as no choice.. it only boils down to whether you choose to make that choice. actually, ironically speaking, you are already making a choice no matter what.. to say or not to say.. either or is already choice.. so, theoratically, there's no such thing as no choice. so i guess, the main thing is making the "wrong" or "right" choices.. den again, wad's wrong and wad's right? i'm not talking bout morally.. cos it's basically common sense to most.. it's the decision.. the cause and effect. up to this point, whoever that is reading this, do u get it?? the choices that you make can either make or break..
for christians, there's sumthing about being accountable, being a disciple.. sumthing just bothers me so much.. i feel the pain of it even. wad's worse/sad, i see my past in that person.. this person has not made a choice to be accountable.. to open up.. but i think that this person has not made a choice not to be either.. how torturous is that.. sitting on the fence.. doesnt it hurt? (think literally) i think that besides whatever the issue is, not making a decision, a choice, is much more painful.. caught in the middle.. how many times you have experience that? dreadful aint it? it's the same here.. i've written sumthing like this before.. it's either in an essay or on this blog.. i really pray that this person would make the choice to be accountable soon.. otherwise, time is just ticking away.. there's so much more that you can do when you get over sumthing that's keeping you.. you struggle, you're stuck there.. not moving up, left nor right.. on the other hand, you may very well be moving down.. yes, the thought of not having to put up a fight is tempting.. the thought of just taking things as it is, is enticing.. BUT, dun settle for anything lesser than you really deserve. i'm sure that you've experienced great times.. trust me, they will come again.. and again and again.. only if you make a choice.. only if you ask for it.. there were times when i felt better thinking negatively.. you may wonder how? it's possible.. a great big trap that i had once chose to step into.. foolish eh? yea.. it's quite mainly in your own hands.. if you dun move, how can you expect God to move..
sumthing to be honest about.. i know that you wont share wadever with me even though i wished you would.. be it age or maturity.. i've got nothing to say except, i wish i could share it with you.. whatever the reason.. cos it's just natural? more or less.. (say it fast and it become "molest". not the point) you'd only share it if i share that i'm going thru sumthing similar and that you've overcome or are overcoming it.. rite? it's like that..
physio at CGH today... yayness to the distance.. lol. but the session was pure torture.. sumthings i just dun get but nevertheless, i'm keeping the faith.. i'm holding on. full restoration will come eventually =) never stop believing. miracles happen when you believe.. emotional, physical ++ it'll come.. healing will come.
wad a long post.. there's more.. but =) period.
again, the translation aint that good.. but nevertheless.. lol. and another thing that i've been seeing everywhere.. "we are a part.. not apart."
THE POWER OF CHOICE.
wow. honestly, i'm wow-ed by the mere sentence itself. it's sumthing that we all have and most of us abuse or abuse most of the time. true enough. there's no such thing as no choice.. it only boils down to whether you choose to make that choice. actually, ironically speaking, you are already making a choice no matter what.. to say or not to say.. either or is already choice.. so, theoratically, there's no such thing as no choice. so i guess, the main thing is making the "wrong" or "right" choices.. den again, wad's wrong and wad's right? i'm not talking bout morally.. cos it's basically common sense to most.. it's the decision.. the cause and effect. up to this point, whoever that is reading this, do u get it?? the choices that you make can either make or break..
for christians, there's sumthing about being accountable, being a disciple.. sumthing just bothers me so much.. i feel the pain of it even. wad's worse/sad, i see my past in that person.. this person has not made a choice to be accountable.. to open up.. but i think that this person has not made a choice not to be either.. how torturous is that.. sitting on the fence.. doesnt it hurt? (think literally) i think that besides whatever the issue is, not making a decision, a choice, is much more painful.. caught in the middle.. how many times you have experience that? dreadful aint it? it's the same here.. i've written sumthing like this before.. it's either in an essay or on this blog.. i really pray that this person would make the choice to be accountable soon.. otherwise, time is just ticking away.. there's so much more that you can do when you get over sumthing that's keeping you.. you struggle, you're stuck there.. not moving up, left nor right.. on the other hand, you may very well be moving down.. yes, the thought of not having to put up a fight is tempting.. the thought of just taking things as it is, is enticing.. BUT, dun settle for anything lesser than you really deserve. i'm sure that you've experienced great times.. trust me, they will come again.. and again and again.. only if you make a choice.. only if you ask for it.. there were times when i felt better thinking negatively.. you may wonder how? it's possible.. a great big trap that i had once chose to step into.. foolish eh? yea.. it's quite mainly in your own hands.. if you dun move, how can you expect God to move..
sumthing to be honest about.. i know that you wont share wadever with me even though i wished you would.. be it age or maturity.. i've got nothing to say except, i wish i could share it with you.. whatever the reason.. cos it's just natural? more or less.. (say it fast and it become "molest". not the point) you'd only share it if i share that i'm going thru sumthing similar and that you've overcome or are overcoming it.. rite? it's like that..
physio at CGH today... yayness to the distance.. lol. but the session was pure torture.. sumthings i just dun get but nevertheless, i'm keeping the faith.. i'm holding on. full restoration will come eventually =) never stop believing. miracles happen when you believe.. emotional, physical ++ it'll come.. healing will come.
wad a long post.. there's more.. but =) period.
Monday, July 17, 2006
_ yo serio no como qué suceder ayer. _ yo ser enojado. bien, clase. más trastornar a veces, qué usted ver ser no qué usted verdadero conseguir él ser uno fachada. _
it's more or less what i want to say.. although when it's translated, it doesnt sound quite right.. o wells. relatively short day due to the O's listening comprehension.. i'm thinking if i should even go sch tmr.. well, i have the CGH appt in the afternoon and it's seriously troublesome to leave the sch, even for a medical appt.. all the whatsoevers.. even a parent's letter, they are apprehensive.. i understand.. but cant you understand that not every parent is so free to come to the school to just sign his or her child out? come on.. be realistic.. i mean, whether the child is able to make his or her way home or wherever, i'm sure that the child is old enough to be aware.. moreover, with cases such as hospital appts. how impractical schools can get in the "oh-so-practical" world. unbelievable. i dun want to go to hospitals anymore.
geog test and chinese test tmr.. tell me about it.
hear hear.. all the "@#?!". i'm not cursing or swearing here.. well, just frustrated i guess.. sumthings words just cant express(pardon my limited vocab).. and yesterday.. i'm not joking alrite.. if i was in a not so good mood to begin with, it'll be hell for u.. okies.. maybe that's a bit over the top.. but yea, you nearly came too close to my breaking point. you may say i'm too serious.. sumtimes yes.. i admit. but you gotta know where to draw the line too at times.. if a crappy mood i was in, i dun want you to make me do things that i'll regret. my choice yes.. but, there are times when we arnt in control.. same goes for u, me.. everyone. trust me.. it was nearly too close..
it's more or less what i want to say.. although when it's translated, it doesnt sound quite right.. o wells. relatively short day due to the O's listening comprehension.. i'm thinking if i should even go sch tmr.. well, i have the CGH appt in the afternoon and it's seriously troublesome to leave the sch, even for a medical appt.. all the whatsoevers.. even a parent's letter, they are apprehensive.. i understand.. but cant you understand that not every parent is so free to come to the school to just sign his or her child out? come on.. be realistic.. i mean, whether the child is able to make his or her way home or wherever, i'm sure that the child is old enough to be aware.. moreover, with cases such as hospital appts. how impractical schools can get in the "oh-so-practical" world. unbelievable. i dun want to go to hospitals anymore.
geog test and chinese test tmr.. tell me about it.
hear hear.. all the "@#?!". i'm not cursing or swearing here.. well, just frustrated i guess.. sumthings words just cant express(pardon my limited vocab).. and yesterday.. i'm not joking alrite.. if i was in a not so good mood to begin with, it'll be hell for u.. okies.. maybe that's a bit over the top.. but yea, you nearly came too close to my breaking point. you may say i'm too serious.. sumtimes yes.. i admit. but you gotta know where to draw the line too at times.. if a crappy mood i was in, i dun want you to make me do things that i'll regret. my choice yes.. but, there are times when we arnt in control.. same goes for u, me.. everyone. trust me.. it was nearly too close..
Sunday, July 16, 2006
woke up nearly fainting.. got these dizzy spells lately.. the room around me would spin slightly.. o.O
svc was great. powerful. i like wad pastor said.. "if you want sumthing that you've never had, do sumthing that you've never done."
healing!! yay!! praise God! the experience was well... new? yea man.. Dr. Che Ahn ask those who needed healing to remain standing and so i did.. during the whole service, i was just praying n praying silently.. God heal my knee.. my cgms laid hands on me and prayed, Dr.Che Ahn led in a prayer as well.. at first i din feel anything.. btw, my knee was hurting when i came to church and practically during the whole of the service.. on and off.. anyways, halfway thru, i started to cry.. my leg was trembling so much that i nearly couldnt stand properly.. initially only my right leg was shaking.. den my whole body ended up shaking?? i couldnt stop it.. all of a sudden, the pain that i was feeling before just disappeared!! right after that, it felt a bit weird.. cant really explain how it truely felt.. it was a rocky start, the first few movements and subsequently.. a slight strain, but there was no pain =) at this point, i was still trembling uncontrollably.. for months i've been praying for this..
i'm thankful.. partial healing but i'm believing for full restoration soon =) the power of confession, prayer and fasting.. amazing. oh, there was other testimonies that were truely awesome! a deaf could hear, a person blind in one eye received partial sight, another with a broken leg walked! praise the Lord! there was also a guy who had a leg shorter than the other and his leg grew to equal length!
met up with "mummy" =) so glad to see her.. nv imagined how i can love and hate her.. come to think of it, it was ridiculous. thank her for the chocs! another thing to thank God for.. teaching me to forgive.. i dun feel as much hatred anymore.. it's great to be free =) it's not being oblivious intentionally, it's accepting. many would ask, "why should i accept it??" well, for certain things, you've gotta accept it before you can change anything. no? =)
sumo house again for fellowship.. nice. ben n jerry's after that. my first. lol. i seriously feel unsafe in the cell.. thanks to anonymous(s). wadever.. haha..
i love God.
i love my cell.
Thankful.
svc was great. powerful. i like wad pastor said.. "if you want sumthing that you've never had, do sumthing that you've never done."
healing!! yay!! praise God! the experience was well... new? yea man.. Dr. Che Ahn ask those who needed healing to remain standing and so i did.. during the whole service, i was just praying n praying silently.. God heal my knee.. my cgms laid hands on me and prayed, Dr.Che Ahn led in a prayer as well.. at first i din feel anything.. btw, my knee was hurting when i came to church and practically during the whole of the service.. on and off.. anyways, halfway thru, i started to cry.. my leg was trembling so much that i nearly couldnt stand properly.. initially only my right leg was shaking.. den my whole body ended up shaking?? i couldnt stop it.. all of a sudden, the pain that i was feeling before just disappeared!! right after that, it felt a bit weird.. cant really explain how it truely felt.. it was a rocky start, the first few movements and subsequently.. a slight strain, but there was no pain =) at this point, i was still trembling uncontrollably.. for months i've been praying for this..
i'm thankful.. partial healing but i'm believing for full restoration soon =) the power of confession, prayer and fasting.. amazing. oh, there was other testimonies that were truely awesome! a deaf could hear, a person blind in one eye received partial sight, another with a broken leg walked! praise the Lord! there was also a guy who had a leg shorter than the other and his leg grew to equal length!
met up with "mummy" =) so glad to see her.. nv imagined how i can love and hate her.. come to think of it, it was ridiculous. thank her for the chocs! another thing to thank God for.. teaching me to forgive.. i dun feel as much hatred anymore.. it's great to be free =) it's not being oblivious intentionally, it's accepting. many would ask, "why should i accept it??" well, for certain things, you've gotta accept it before you can change anything. no? =)
sumo house again for fellowship.. nice. ben n jerry's after that. my first. lol. i seriously feel unsafe in the cell.. thanks to anonymous(s). wadever.. haha..
i love God.
i love my cell.
Thankful.
Friday, July 14, 2006
argh.. i dun feel good. not good at all.. blegh. cancelled tuition at the last hr.. quite literally.
BIO ROCKS!
a proclamation to spite ongton.. haha! there was the bio common test after school today.. so the poor bio peeps have to stay back.. anyways, the paper was super screwed! so funny to a certain extent.. haha.. there was a question without any answer choice, another with a handicap of colours.. another with no answer cos all the options were wrong until the teacher changed the answer option.. and it turned out to the answer for that question.. o.O lol.. here comes the worse one.. GAY MICE?!?! hahaha.. cos we were to find out wad was the chance of a female being produced from 2 mice. the mice were numbered and apparently, they asked us to find out the result of that of 2 male mice breeding. !!!! haha!!! i still wanna laugh man! hahaha.. so ridiculous! i wanted to just put 0% for the answer.. but, mdm ho came to our class again and told us to assume that the mice were homosexuals!! that's worse that incest!! joke of the century man!! among the bio students that is.. hahaha.. mrs liang and mdm ho were like rushing here and there between the bio classes.. eventually, they changed the mice number and it was back to "normal". LOL. wad an interesting afternoon.. haha.. the wonders of genetics!
GOD ROCKS EVEN MORE!
it was a relatively pleasant day except for the occassional hiccups.. i like the song that alex composed and shared during morning devotion.. it was good. =) i nv thought that sharing morning devotion would gain you CIP hrs.. o.O just find it weird.. lol. i mean, it's a privilege to share.. wad's with the CIP hrs?? o wells.. already secured an A1 for CCA records already..(LEAPS) moreover, my CIP hrs have already reached over 100 plus hrs.. the maximum points gained.. =) actually, it's rather easy to hit a 100.. just do it! but, i still dun get the LEAP system.. so confusing.. some say that even being an emcee can gain u participation points.. o.O den i should get a couple?! haha.. wadever.. "like that also can meh??" sense the bewilderment.. haha. was asking ms ng bout it the other day.. but she had to rush off half way.. to take photos.. lol. o wells..
"You pray, asking God to help you get through to the people around. But how can He, if you won’t even let Him get through to you?"
BIO ROCKS!
a proclamation to spite ongton.. haha! there was the bio common test after school today.. so the poor bio peeps have to stay back.. anyways, the paper was super screwed! so funny to a certain extent.. haha.. there was a question without any answer choice, another with a handicap of colours.. another with no answer cos all the options were wrong until the teacher changed the answer option.. and it turned out to the answer for that question.. o.O lol.. here comes the worse one.. GAY MICE?!?! hahaha.. cos we were to find out wad was the chance of a female being produced from 2 mice. the mice were numbered and apparently, they asked us to find out the result of that of 2 male mice breeding. !!!! haha!!! i still wanna laugh man! hahaha.. so ridiculous! i wanted to just put 0% for the answer.. but, mdm ho came to our class again and told us to assume that the mice were homosexuals!! that's worse that incest!! joke of the century man!! among the bio students that is.. hahaha.. mrs liang and mdm ho were like rushing here and there between the bio classes.. eventually, they changed the mice number and it was back to "normal". LOL. wad an interesting afternoon.. haha.. the wonders of genetics!
GOD ROCKS EVEN MORE!
it was a relatively pleasant day except for the occassional hiccups.. i like the song that alex composed and shared during morning devotion.. it was good. =) i nv thought that sharing morning devotion would gain you CIP hrs.. o.O just find it weird.. lol. i mean, it's a privilege to share.. wad's with the CIP hrs?? o wells.. already secured an A1 for CCA records already..(LEAPS) moreover, my CIP hrs have already reached over 100 plus hrs.. the maximum points gained.. =) actually, it's rather easy to hit a 100.. just do it! but, i still dun get the LEAP system.. so confusing.. some say that even being an emcee can gain u participation points.. o.O den i should get a couple?! haha.. wadever.. "like that also can meh??" sense the bewilderment.. haha. was asking ms ng bout it the other day.. but she had to rush off half way.. to take photos.. lol. o wells..
"You pray, asking God to help you get through to the people around. But how can He, if you won’t even let Him get through to you?"
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
[availability. all it takes is just u wanting to be.]
the clouds were nice today=) all that happened was just sunshine after the rain.. the wind was cool, the sun was up. a pleasant day =) another example of how things will turn out alrite in the end.. if you just choose to stick around, be patient and expect. it was one of those cold bitter mornings that have been occurring quite recently. notice, the past few wks have been all sunny and everything.. all of a sudden, things just change.. cold and wet days just dropped by out of the blue.. seems like everything follows a pattern like that.. even the weather. lol. the thing is, if you just choose to stick around and hope, you'll see that things will work out in the end. sumtimes, in the storm (wet n cold days), we just simply cant see what things could be.. just remember.. whether the sun shines or not, it IS there. it's only a matter of time that it'll come out from behind the clouds.. shining so brightly, drying the puddles that the rain made.. puddles of tears.. piercing thru those dark cumulonimbus figures.. did a check on the meaning of cumulonimbus - An extremely dense, vertically developed cumulus with a relatively hazy outline and a glaciated top extending to great heights, usually producing heavy rains, thunderstorms, or hailstorms. just like life eh? to a certain extent. hmm.. maybe the link aint that prominent.
anyways, i thank God for every day.. every day is actually a miracle. thank God too for the time to look at the clouds.. lol. receiving a msg saying that tuition would start 1/2hr later, i was already out of the house. walked to the bball court, which was on the way, and just sat there. the air was clear and cool.. nice. =) watched the clouds just pass by.. peace. cool breeze rustling the leaves.. lovely. =)
math has turned out to be rather enjoyable.. heard that the current sec2s do not have to learn relative velocity when they come sec4.. o.O can they just decide?? lol! o wells..
no matter what, i'm not letting go. i dun want to. keeping things in check. no more getting out of hand. pardon me if it happens. i'm trying.
the clouds were nice today=) all that happened was just sunshine after the rain.. the wind was cool, the sun was up. a pleasant day =) another example of how things will turn out alrite in the end.. if you just choose to stick around, be patient and expect. it was one of those cold bitter mornings that have been occurring quite recently. notice, the past few wks have been all sunny and everything.. all of a sudden, things just change.. cold and wet days just dropped by out of the blue.. seems like everything follows a pattern like that.. even the weather. lol. the thing is, if you just choose to stick around and hope, you'll see that things will work out in the end. sumtimes, in the storm (wet n cold days), we just simply cant see what things could be.. just remember.. whether the sun shines or not, it IS there. it's only a matter of time that it'll come out from behind the clouds.. shining so brightly, drying the puddles that the rain made.. puddles of tears.. piercing thru those dark cumulonimbus figures.. did a check on the meaning of cumulonimbus - An extremely dense, vertically developed cumulus with a relatively hazy outline and a glaciated top extending to great heights, usually producing heavy rains, thunderstorms, or hailstorms. just like life eh? to a certain extent. hmm.. maybe the link aint that prominent.
anyways, i thank God for every day.. every day is actually a miracle. thank God too for the time to look at the clouds.. lol. receiving a msg saying that tuition would start 1/2hr later, i was already out of the house. walked to the bball court, which was on the way, and just sat there. the air was clear and cool.. nice. =) watched the clouds just pass by.. peace. cool breeze rustling the leaves.. lovely. =)
math has turned out to be rather enjoyable.. heard that the current sec2s do not have to learn relative velocity when they come sec4.. o.O can they just decide?? lol! o wells..
no matter what, i'm not letting go. i dun want to. keeping things in check. no more getting out of hand. pardon me if it happens. i'm trying.
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
[wake up call again. yep. it's time. it's time to grow up.]
the blahness of it for the whole of yesterday night.. wad a "blast"!
nah.. it aint gonna be about independence.. not really anyway.. i'm not thinking. lol. hmm.. according to my calculations, we've got approx 44days (excluding the wkends) till prelims. that means, we'd have to cover 3 chapters (or more) of which ever subj per day.. o.O that's a lot. planning to keep hitting the target of at least 6hrs per day (x5). it's not enough actually.. but, it's a start. means every wk, it'd be ard 35 hrs?? ard there.. wow. anyway, i think my previous post was rather redundant. i just like debating/arguing.. lol.
boy it's tough.
i love God. =)
the blahness of it for the whole of yesterday night.. wad a "blast"!
nah.. it aint gonna be about independence.. not really anyway.. i'm not thinking. lol. hmm.. according to my calculations, we've got approx 44days (excluding the wkends) till prelims. that means, we'd have to cover 3 chapters (or more) of which ever subj per day.. o.O that's a lot. planning to keep hitting the target of at least 6hrs per day (x5). it's not enough actually.. but, it's a start. means every wk, it'd be ard 35 hrs?? ard there.. wow. anyway, i think my previous post was rather redundant. i just like debating/arguing.. lol.
boy it's tough.
i love God. =)
Monday, July 10, 2006
[NO.]
was practically thinking bout this the whole day? kinda.. impact vs influence. can one really not influence another?? a bit odd and wrong to put it that way?? it's more like, you can influence someone.. but, it is whether that person allows you to influence him/her. ultimately, you are still influencing. no?? (feels like that kind of trick question.. chicken/egg first thingy.. though MM Lee apparently "knows" the answer to that.. o.O) or should i say, you can influence.. whether u have done it/succeeded in doing it is another thing? sounds better.. CAN vs ALREADY HAVE.
influence.. that's how the world works isnt it? but, it den boils down to the choice of wanting to be influenced or not.. to be part of this world. now that's more logical.. to me that is.. =S not saying that influence is a bad thing.. though it really sounds like it here.. everyone influences one another at every moment.. it just happens whether u realise it or not.. okies.. the context is a bit confusing.. even i am confused. cant quite think of a better way to present this.. so, i think the bottom line is, you CAN influence another (the ability).. BUT, it's the other person's CHOICE to be influenced or not (the probability).. O.o
hmm.. about impact.. i'd say it's more difficult to impact than to influence.. anyone can influence, but few can impact.. it's just like, "many are called, few are chosen".. differentiation b/w... din really think much on impact.. well, i can say that i've been impacted.. and i'm glad. =)
LIFE = CHOICES++
tuition marathon..
next thing : independence. (hopefully)
was practically thinking bout this the whole day? kinda.. impact vs influence. can one really not influence another?? a bit odd and wrong to put it that way?? it's more like, you can influence someone.. but, it is whether that person allows you to influence him/her. ultimately, you are still influencing. no?? (feels like that kind of trick question.. chicken/egg first thingy.. though MM Lee apparently "knows" the answer to that.. o.O) or should i say, you can influence.. whether u have done it/succeeded in doing it is another thing? sounds better.. CAN vs ALREADY HAVE.
influence.. that's how the world works isnt it? but, it den boils down to the choice of wanting to be influenced or not.. to be part of this world. now that's more logical.. to me that is.. =S not saying that influence is a bad thing.. though it really sounds like it here.. everyone influences one another at every moment.. it just happens whether u realise it or not.. okies.. the context is a bit confusing.. even i am confused. cant quite think of a better way to present this.. so, i think the bottom line is, you CAN influence another (the ability).. BUT, it's the other person's CHOICE to be influenced or not (the probability).. O.o
hmm.. about impact.. i'd say it's more difficult to impact than to influence.. anyone can influence, but few can impact.. it's just like, "many are called, few are chosen".. differentiation b/w... din really think much on impact.. well, i can say that i've been impacted.. and i'm glad. =)
LIFE = CHOICES++
tuition marathon..
next thing : independence. (hopefully)
Sunday, July 09, 2006
ministry?
chorus board?
sealed.
chorus board?
sealed.
BY ORDER OF JTKY..
7 random things about myself:
-i wanna grow taller-
-i'm frm E237 & i love them loads =)-
-i play the guitar-
-i like sports..esp diving-
-i'm not very girl (dun like skirts/dresses)-
-i want to travel ard the world-
-nature person, dun like shopping(LOL.)-
7 things that scare me:
-when ppl get angry-
-shadows that come from nowhere?-
-weird noises in the dead of the night-
-when ppl look fierce?-
-losing the ppl i love?-
-losing stuff that mean a lot-
-exams?? (not really)-
7 random songs at the moment:
-Breaking Free- (High Sch Musical)
-When There Was Me And You- (High Sch Musical)
-Because of You- (Kelly Clarkson)
-Kiss Goodbye- (Wang Lee Hom)
-Superwoman- (CaoGe)
-Find Your Wings- (Mark Harris)
-Take All of Me- (CHC)
7 things i like the most:
-Going to church-
-Praising n worshipping God-
-being with my cell-
-photography-
-going to the beach and just chill-
-coffee and chat-
-sleeping? (duno? LOL.)
7 things i say the most:
-yea (man)-
-erm.. ok..-
-duno?-
-nvm-
-nth-
-whatever-
-how ah?-
7 people to do this:
-Shey-
-CaHo-
-Siyan-
-Jeannette-
-Joanne-
-Christine-
-Shiyun-
that's bout it..?? haha.. yea man.. should i watch the match or not?? hmm..
~el curativo~
Saturday, July 08, 2006
[no words can express how grateful i am =)]
cell was great. the presence of God was just amazing. James 1:12. Thanks aileen. you wrote that card one yr ago.. and now, God has reminded me again. thanks jos for being patient and caring. =) making yourself available, encouraging, teaching, praying and helping me. thank you =) great preaching by the way =D jia you! you go woman!! hahaha.. =p
my leg smells of the chinese medicine now.. argh. man was it PAIN! haha.. my uncle helped me rub that BIG patch of black just now.. i so wanted to just scream!! lol.. and, it seems that it got bigger?? lol! we'll see how it looks like tmr.. haha.. i seriously cant imagine how sumthing that felt like just a light knock can become so serious.. o.O the power of water?? haha! my eyes are burning again. O.o
i'm a harzard to myself. lol.
blast.. i'm feeling very giddy all of a sudden. vertigo. no gd no gd.
cell was great. the presence of God was just amazing. James 1:12. Thanks aileen. you wrote that card one yr ago.. and now, God has reminded me again. thanks jos for being patient and caring. =) making yourself available, encouraging, teaching, praying and helping me. thank you =) great preaching by the way =D jia you! you go woman!! hahaha.. =p
my leg smells of the chinese medicine now.. argh. man was it PAIN! haha.. my uncle helped me rub that BIG patch of black just now.. i so wanted to just scream!! lol.. and, it seems that it got bigger?? lol! we'll see how it looks like tmr.. haha.. i seriously cant imagine how sumthing that felt like just a light knock can become so serious.. o.O the power of water?? haha! my eyes are burning again. O.o
i'm a harzard to myself. lol.
blast.. i'm feeling very giddy all of a sudden. vertigo. no gd no gd.
Thursday, July 06, 2006
it's not that people dun care.. it's how much you're willing to let them care about.. rite??
bio-ing. sexual reproduction in animals.. o.O man.. i need a voice recorder! i want to try this way of learning, but my mp3 player cant load the recording onto the comp! anyway idea why it aint working?? sheesh..
bio-ing. sexual reproduction in animals.. o.O man.. i need a voice recorder! i want to try this way of learning, but my mp3 player cant load the recording onto the comp! anyway idea why it aint working?? sheesh..
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
that bump on my shin, that was previously quite invisible, has become a BIG DARK patch.. o.O yikes! o well.. had tuition in the afternoon.
i need healing. divine health and restoration. please. no more. >_<
i need healing. divine health and restoration. please. no more. >_<
Tuesday, July 04, 2006
[can someone answer me???]
quote of the day: " In times like these, when a storm comes up quickly and you need a lamppost to cling to, you don't want to waste your time deciding which lamppost it's going to be. This is no time to put your faith in luck or fate, only God."
was reading thru the older entries.. came upon this quote from the show, "Touched by an Angel". i miss the series.. the stories unfold so real, words that really makes one think. there are many more quotes from the show.. sumtimes, reading it just wakes one up. in a snap. just like that. another one that i just came across while looking thru their website. "You must never hate what God loves, and God loves you." there's more.. much more.. =)
[make it disappear somebody.. i dun want it.. no more.. please.. >_<]
those little lights dotting the skies are visible once again. small, yes. but they are there.. they are shining. technically. the thing is, they are there, they are shining, they are doing wad they do best. they never fail to make me smile =)
quote of the day: " In times like these, when a storm comes up quickly and you need a lamppost to cling to, you don't want to waste your time deciding which lamppost it's going to be. This is no time to put your faith in luck or fate, only God."
was reading thru the older entries.. came upon this quote from the show, "Touched by an Angel". i miss the series.. the stories unfold so real, words that really makes one think. there are many more quotes from the show.. sumtimes, reading it just wakes one up. in a snap. just like that. another one that i just came across while looking thru their website. "You must never hate what God loves, and God loves you." there's more.. much more.. =)
[make it disappear somebody.. i dun want it.. no more.. please.. >_<]
those little lights dotting the skies are visible once again. small, yes. but they are there.. they are shining. technically. the thing is, they are there, they are shining, they are doing wad they do best. they never fail to make me smile =)
FIND YOUR WINGS
It's only for a moment you are mine to hold
The plans that heaven has for you
Will all too soon unfold
So many different prayers I'll pray
For all that you might do
But most of all I'll want to know
You're walking in the truth
And If I never told you
I want you to know
As I watch you grow
I pray that God would fill your heart with dreams
And that faith gives you the courage
To dare to do great things
I'm here for you whatever this life brings
So let my love give you roots
And help you find your wings
May passion be the wind
That leads you through your days
And may conviction keep you strong
Guide you on your way
May there be many moments
That make your life so sweet
Oh, but more than memories
It's not living if you don't reach for the sky
I'll have tears as you take off
But I'll cheer as you fly
this song is way nice..
influx again. horrendous. headache all the way back home.. till now. severe stomach pain too. argh. btw, i've got this bump along my shin. but i duno how i got it. haha! i just have to run my finger over, den can feel the bump. oh it so does not hurt.. haha! looks like a bruise, it's changing colour.. haha.. n i still duno how i got it. o.O ouchie mama.. haha. feels odd.. den again, it feels like a big lump there. if i just run my finger over, it hurts! but, if i press on it directly, it doesnt really? odd eh?? just feels like a hard lump.. that apparently appeared out of the blue.. O.o
It's only for a moment you are mine to hold
The plans that heaven has for you
Will all too soon unfold
So many different prayers I'll pray
For all that you might do
But most of all I'll want to know
You're walking in the truth
And If I never told you
I want you to know
As I watch you grow
I pray that God would fill your heart with dreams
And that faith gives you the courage
To dare to do great things
I'm here for you whatever this life brings
So let my love give you roots
And help you find your wings
May passion be the wind
That leads you through your days
And may conviction keep you strong
Guide you on your way
May there be many moments
That make your life so sweet
Oh, but more than memories
It's not living if you don't reach for the sky
I'll have tears as you take off
But I'll cheer as you fly
this song is way nice..
influx again. horrendous. headache all the way back home.. till now. severe stomach pain too. argh. btw, i've got this bump along my shin. but i duno how i got it. haha! i just have to run my finger over, den can feel the bump. oh it so does not hurt.. haha! looks like a bruise, it's changing colour.. haha.. n i still duno how i got it. o.O ouchie mama.. haha. feels odd.. den again, it feels like a big lump there. if i just run my finger over, it hurts! but, if i press on it directly, it doesnt really? odd eh?? just feels like a hard lump.. that apparently appeared out of the blue.. O.o
Monday, July 03, 2006
i saw it.. but i'm not gonna do it.. for now at least. =)
went swimming.. hot! but that's the time where there is lesser people. ling joined me an hour later.. cartoon. k lar.. we swam n chatted again. =)
i'm burnt! haha.. but good thing that it aint very bad.. at least my skin wont peel.. i think. o.O
you know what?
i'm glad =)
i'm not sure bout the referral.. but, i feel glad. really =)
[it should have, one way or another..]
went swimming.. hot! but that's the time where there is lesser people. ling joined me an hour later.. cartoon. k lar.. we swam n chatted again. =)
i'm burnt! haha.. but good thing that it aint very bad.. at least my skin wont peel.. i think. o.O
you know what?
i'm glad =)
i'm not sure bout the referral.. but, i feel glad. really =)
[it should have, one way or another..]
Sunday, July 02, 2006
i'm hooked on chili+potatoes.. o.O k.. that's just too random. haha! (so angmoh pai)
3rd time i'm blogging today..
gave some thought to shiyun's entry.. and of cos pst tan's msg. just felt that we were going thru the same thing../ went thru.. whichever. as i've shared with jt, the last 2-3 yrs, was considered a struggle. PO, myself.. whatever other reasons.. i must say and thank God for giving me the strength to hold on. it was tough. definitely. the ups and downs are never ending and it is said to be.. times when i feel lonely even admist loads of people, how more terrible it felt when i'm really alone at home. just imagine, with the suicidal thoughts and stuff like that(wad are the best ways to die).. punching the walls. you may say that, you know you are never alone... something along that line. but, that's the weakness of being human. there's just so much btw knowing wad's wad, how things should be and the way things really are. very often, when someone opens up, 2 ways to see it..
1. it'd be an entry for future hurts, making one vunerable. [negative]
2. it enables one to be balanced emotionally.. sumthing like that.. [positive]
n being human, one would normally choose the former..(-ve) why? cos this world aint all that we think and want it to be. simple answer. i have never been quite so honest bout wad's deep inside until now.. it feels good to be released. hesitant still.. struggling to put things in words that would aptly express.. but, things often never turn out the way we want to does it? lol. it's really a decision and choice. trusting in the natural or the supernatural.. ultimately, only God has the answers to our questions.. okies, to put it in the context of natural n supernatural may be a bit difficult to relate.. in a sense. den again, maybe not??? cant think of relations now.. =x
circumstances, situations. they make us falter. but ultimately, cos we allow ourselves to falter.. cos, we are human. the difference is that, we can pick ourselves up with the help of God or we can just sink in deeper to wadever.. regrets are present cos we always look back and think, "what if?" how bout looking ahead and think, "what's more?" in a positive manner of cos.
okies.. pardon me, but my flow of thoughts seemed to have stopped. lol. another time den..
3rd time i'm blogging today..
gave some thought to shiyun's entry.. and of cos pst tan's msg. just felt that we were going thru the same thing../ went thru.. whichever. as i've shared with jt, the last 2-3 yrs, was considered a struggle. PO, myself.. whatever other reasons.. i must say and thank God for giving me the strength to hold on. it was tough. definitely. the ups and downs are never ending and it is said to be.. times when i feel lonely even admist loads of people, how more terrible it felt when i'm really alone at home. just imagine, with the suicidal thoughts and stuff like that(wad are the best ways to die).. punching the walls. you may say that, you know you are never alone... something along that line. but, that's the weakness of being human. there's just so much btw knowing wad's wad, how things should be and the way things really are. very often, when someone opens up, 2 ways to see it..
1. it'd be an entry for future hurts, making one vunerable. [negative]
2. it enables one to be balanced emotionally.. sumthing like that.. [positive]
n being human, one would normally choose the former..(-ve) why? cos this world aint all that we think and want it to be. simple answer. i have never been quite so honest bout wad's deep inside until now.. it feels good to be released. hesitant still.. struggling to put things in words that would aptly express.. but, things often never turn out the way we want to does it? lol. it's really a decision and choice. trusting in the natural or the supernatural.. ultimately, only God has the answers to our questions.. okies, to put it in the context of natural n supernatural may be a bit difficult to relate.. in a sense. den again, maybe not??? cant think of relations now.. =x
circumstances, situations. they make us falter. but ultimately, cos we allow ourselves to falter.. cos, we are human. the difference is that, we can pick ourselves up with the help of God or we can just sink in deeper to wadever.. regrets are present cos we always look back and think, "what if?" how bout looking ahead and think, "what's more?" in a positive manner of cos.
okies.. pardon me, but my flow of thoughts seemed to have stopped. lol. another time den..
HIGH SCHOOL MUSICAL ROCKS!
finally got to watch it just now.. missed it last wk cos of the wedding dinner. the songs are amazing, the whole layout.. WOOTS! haha.. kudos to the director.. haha! i'm so high rite now.. haha.. =D
jocelin tan keat ying!!
finally got to watch it just now.. missed it last wk cos of the wedding dinner. the songs are amazing, the whole layout.. WOOTS! haha.. kudos to the director.. haha! i'm so high rite now.. haha.. =D
jocelin tan keat ying!!
today's svc was too great for words.. [minus the ...]
during worship [at the beginning], i felt like crying, but i held the tears back.. honestly, i have no idea why i held them back.. but, after pastor tan finished preaching and started praying for the leaders, the moment the worship song was sung, i just simply broke down.. take all of me.. really. i seriously wonder if they were my own thoughts, or God's. i dun even know if u can call it a burden. whichever..
rise up.
have the faith.
have the courage.
take a step.
correction.
take THE step.
i really wonder.. =S so uncertain..
i felt lifted up. even though it din feel like all of it, and i was crying so terribly. i still feel like there's so much to let out.. just read shiyun's blog(the entry on 1st july).. it got me thinking again.. that's the thing bout people who think too much.. most of the time, it just makes things even more confusing than it already is.. lol. =x
BS.. fasting n prayer..
humbling.
talking bout tattoos, is it ok to have them?? lol.. just curious. i actually wanted one last time.. haha.. n when i jokingly brought it up with my mum, she was like, ok lor.. haha! o.O weirdness. anyway, caught her finally! after svc went to look for her.. oh how i love n hate her.. lol. less on the hate now.. =) much much less. went for fellowship with the cell.. this "SUMO" place at bedok. sumthing like that.. din makan.. no money.. haha. wasnt that hungry anyway.. =) the rest went Kbox, i went home.. blah blah.. haha.. =x wanted to go.. but o well.. hahaha.
~i shall do it again this wk.~
during worship [at the beginning], i felt like crying, but i held the tears back.. honestly, i have no idea why i held them back.. but, after pastor tan finished preaching and started praying for the leaders, the moment the worship song was sung, i just simply broke down.. take all of me.. really. i seriously wonder if they were my own thoughts, or God's. i dun even know if u can call it a burden. whichever..
rise up.
have the faith.
have the courage.
take a step.
correction.
take THE step.
i really wonder.. =S so uncertain..
i felt lifted up. even though it din feel like all of it, and i was crying so terribly. i still feel like there's so much to let out.. just read shiyun's blog(the entry on 1st july).. it got me thinking again.. that's the thing bout people who think too much.. most of the time, it just makes things even more confusing than it already is.. lol. =x
BS.. fasting n prayer..
humbling.
talking bout tattoos, is it ok to have them?? lol.. just curious. i actually wanted one last time.. haha.. n when i jokingly brought it up with my mum, she was like, ok lor.. haha! o.O weirdness. anyway, caught her finally! after svc went to look for her.. oh how i love n hate her.. lol. less on the hate now.. =) much much less. went for fellowship with the cell.. this "SUMO" place at bedok. sumthing like that.. din makan.. no money.. haha. wasnt that hungry anyway.. =) the rest went Kbox, i went home.. blah blah.. haha.. =x wanted to go.. but o well.. hahaha.
~i shall do it again this wk.~
Saturday, July 01, 2006
[To live, would be an awfully big adventure]--Peter Pan
u say u dun know how to care.. if u dun know anything, how would u know how to care? No confidence, no trust. how can there not be any disappointment.
the pain/discomfort's coming n going.. if it goes on like this, i aint gonna sleep tonite.. SHOO!
u say u dun know how to care.. if u dun know anything, how would u know how to care? No confidence, no trust. how can there not be any disappointment.
the pain/discomfort's coming n going.. if it goes on like this, i aint gonna sleep tonite.. SHOO!