P R O F I L E.
Amanda
19
exTPS.exAHS.
TemasekPoly.BIO
Amanda
19
exTPS.exAHS.
TemasekPoly.BIO
T A L K S.
P A S T.
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Sunday, May 31, 2009
Ytd was... eventful?
- a ridiculous and unprofessional reporter
- big hooha over suspicious loss which didn't quite make sense
- ever more like-minded ppl (typical)
- unruly kids in the morn
on the other hand,
- loads of laughs from stories of the past (my weekly dose of laughter med!)
- got chance at interaction (which i've got so much more to learn and tks to Fi for teaching)
come to think of it, things always happen whenever there's more manpower?
or is it the power of C? hahaha..
it was oddly tiring and i just lapsed into a mood like every now and then... =S
******************************************************************
i prefer rats to mice.
that's when it comes to lab.
those little buggers are seriously gd biters!
plus, they're so hard to catch!
pract can be draining.. mentally n physically.
i think when it ends, everyone's like.. FINALLY. hahaha
******************************************************************
now, i believe one can actually see death coming.
i don't get how i can stand seeing dead bodies(not actual ones though)
yet, i start to get a little emotional over the dying..
just looking at her face, it's hard to describe wad i saw
today's my granduncle's bdae and their wedding anniversary as well..
so many years on, it's a witness of their love for each other
just being there, just standing by.
when my grandfather passed yrs ago
maybe it was cos i was really young and don't know much
can't even remember if i cried or knew wad was happening
i guess that's wad i fear? losing ppl.
that's why i pray that prayer
that's why i "reason" myself out of it
that's why i deny
that's why i wish i were a jellyfish
that's why.
yea, it's kinda silly.
i mean, who doesn't pass on..
but i guess, it just hurts less?
though sumtimes it doesn't quite seem like it
so contradictory.
- a ridiculous and unprofessional reporter
- big hooha over suspicious loss which didn't quite make sense
- ever more like-minded ppl (typical)
- unruly kids in the morn
on the other hand,
- loads of laughs from stories of the past (my weekly dose of laughter med!)
- got chance at interaction (which i've got so much more to learn and tks to Fi for teaching)
come to think of it, things always happen whenever there's more manpower?
or is it the power of C? hahaha..
it was oddly tiring and i just lapsed into a mood like every now and then... =S
******************************************************************
i prefer rats to mice.
that's when it comes to lab.
those little buggers are seriously gd biters!
plus, they're so hard to catch!
pract can be draining.. mentally n physically.
i think when it ends, everyone's like.. FINALLY. hahaha
******************************************************************
now, i believe one can actually see death coming.
i don't get how i can stand seeing dead bodies(not actual ones though)
yet, i start to get a little emotional over the dying..
just looking at her face, it's hard to describe wad i saw
today's my granduncle's bdae and their wedding anniversary as well..
so many years on, it's a witness of their love for each other
just being there, just standing by.
when my grandfather passed yrs ago
maybe it was cos i was really young and don't know much
can't even remember if i cried or knew wad was happening
i guess that's wad i fear? losing ppl.
that's why i pray that prayer
that's why i "reason" myself out of it
that's why i deny
that's why i wish i were a jellyfish
that's why.
yea, it's kinda silly.
i mean, who doesn't pass on..
but i guess, it just hurts less?
though sumtimes it doesn't quite seem like it
so contradictory.
Monday, May 25, 2009
i'm DESPERATELY waiting.
hopefully when i check my mail later tonite, there'll be good news!
yes, i'm getting really anxious.
but i don't wanna just jump into things.
why is there tis kinda deadline?!
First time diving in lagoon last sat.
there's actually quite some stuff down there! lol..
i sound like some nut.
it was cool in a way.. haha.
but it was tiring chasing after Clarice
working with Clarice is always a blast!
something will surely happen.. hahah
looking forward to nxt sat =)
really praying and hoping.
hopefully when i check my mail later tonite, there'll be good news!
yes, i'm getting really anxious.
but i don't wanna just jump into things.
why is there tis kinda deadline?!
First time diving in lagoon last sat.
there's actually quite some stuff down there! lol..
i sound like some nut.
it was cool in a way.. haha.
but it was tiring chasing after Clarice
working with Clarice is always a blast!
something will surely happen.. hahah
looking forward to nxt sat =)
really praying and hoping.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
4 hrs of slp!
just to catch my dad in the morn for his signature.. lol.
AHHHhhh!!! CYC has gotten really FAIR! hahaha..
so nice to see him again =D
even though it was only for like an hr plus with Agnes at City Hall's Mac.
searching for accomodations is really a head spinner!
have i mentioned that my OSIP's gonna be 5 mths?!
it sounds really really LONG... that's like the max.
Sep 2009 until Feb 2010..
prolly back just in time for CNY!
glad that i handed in the CL n Resume alr..
if not, it'd be 2 more assignments added to the never ceasing pile.
feels like there's loads of stuff in my head and it's abt to explode!
things to do, find, hand in and take note of.
deadlines.
i need lifelines instead.
just to catch my dad in the morn for his signature.. lol.
AHHHhhh!!! CYC has gotten really FAIR! hahaha..
so nice to see him again =D
even though it was only for like an hr plus with Agnes at City Hall's Mac.
searching for accomodations is really a head spinner!
have i mentioned that my OSIP's gonna be 5 mths?!
it sounds really really LONG... that's like the max.
Sep 2009 until Feb 2010..
prolly back just in time for CNY!
glad that i handed in the CL n Resume alr..
if not, it'd be 2 more assignments added to the never ceasing pile.
feels like there's loads of stuff in my head and it's abt to explode!
things to do, find, hand in and take note of.
deadlines.
i need lifelines instead.
Monday, May 18, 2009
don't know why i woke at 2am and again at 4am =(
so tired rite now, but there's still things to be done.
nitemare arh!! not entirely actually..
it was a really messy messy dream though..
but i only rmb San pulling my ears, it was so painful that i woke up at that moment =.="
but before that, she was "tekan-ing" me!
nowadays, it's like really confusing dreams every nite!
part of my thoughts during the day are thrown in
plus a dose of any-know-how??
GARR. i only know that i havent been sleeping well.
i'm very tired.
to the point that i unintentionally slept in BPT lec.
i just want a good nite's rest.
just looking at TE's PDF file turns me off
19 pages of misery.
not to mention, another 19 articles to match! =)
lets see.. there's still..
CSAS pract papers & editing
LAST lec & tut quizzes
BPT proj
TE tut
did i miss anything?
just have tis nagging feeling
so tired rite now, but there's still things to be done.
nitemare arh!! not entirely actually..
it was a really messy messy dream though..
but i only rmb San pulling my ears, it was so painful that i woke up at that moment =.="
but before that, she was "tekan-ing" me!
nowadays, it's like really confusing dreams every nite!
part of my thoughts during the day are thrown in
plus a dose of any-know-how??
GARR. i only know that i havent been sleeping well.
i'm very tired.
to the point that i unintentionally slept in BPT lec.
i just want a good nite's rest.
just looking at TE's PDF file turns me off
19 pages of misery.
not to mention, another 19 articles to match! =)
lets see.. there's still..
CSAS pract papers & editing
LAST lec & tut quizzes
BPT proj
TE tut
did i miss anything?
just have tis nagging feeling
Friday, May 15, 2009
with a nice cold beer by my side on a friday nite, wad more could i ask for?
company? hahaha
in a blink of an eye, the wkend's here alr..
serious, where did all the time go?
well, had a rough wk in the area of sleep =(
just can't seem to get anything decent.
had an odd n terrible dream last nite..
there were a lot of ppl that i didn't know
and they all seem to walk into danger knowingly.. =s
danger = death and torture. YEA. sick.
dreamt of a fren too.. but it seemed totally unrelated?? hahaha..
2 dreams mixed into one? sumthing like that.. confusing.
feeling kind lost that there's no work tmr. HA.
and happy tht i'll be working the nxt 2 sats =)
well, OSIP's coming along halfway..
the thing to settle now would be the accomodations in Queensland..
quite a headache.. lol.
managed to find some properties that were reasonably priced though =)
but i still hope that Dr. Ian would be able to host us.. LOL.
praying and hoping for providence.
Ms. C is really getting to me.
a total narcissist..
and becoming quite a pain in the ass.
yes, i know you're knowledgeable..
so i presume that u actually know the meaning of humility. tsk.
looks like i was right.. knew it the moment i saw you.
LAST lab was rat day.
there are sumthings that i wish to say, but since it's not gonna come out nice..
i better keep my mouth shut.
just hope that things will get better.
don't get me wrong, things arn't all that bad.
in fact, i think i've actually been smiling and laughing more.. hahaha
even when i'm working.. LOL. =)
it's all a choice i guess.
why choose to feel bad/sad?
of cos, there are times that we feel that way inevitably
still, it's a choice of perspective. it's a CHOICE.
thanks for the reminder my fren. =)
company? hahaha
in a blink of an eye, the wkend's here alr..
serious, where did all the time go?
well, had a rough wk in the area of sleep =(
just can't seem to get anything decent.
had an odd n terrible dream last nite..
there were a lot of ppl that i didn't know
and they all seem to walk into danger knowingly.. =s
danger = death and torture. YEA. sick.
dreamt of a fren too.. but it seemed totally unrelated?? hahaha..
2 dreams mixed into one? sumthing like that.. confusing.
feeling kind lost that there's no work tmr. HA.
and happy tht i'll be working the nxt 2 sats =)
well, OSIP's coming along halfway..
the thing to settle now would be the accomodations in Queensland..
quite a headache.. lol.
managed to find some properties that were reasonably priced though =)
but i still hope that Dr. Ian would be able to host us.. LOL.
praying and hoping for providence.
Ms. C is really getting to me.
a total narcissist..
and becoming quite a pain in the ass.
yes, i know you're knowledgeable..
so i presume that u actually know the meaning of humility. tsk.
looks like i was right.. knew it the moment i saw you.
LAST lab was rat day.
there are sumthings that i wish to say, but since it's not gonna come out nice..
i better keep my mouth shut.
just hope that things will get better.
don't get me wrong, things arn't all that bad.
in fact, i think i've actually been smiling and laughing more.. hahaha
even when i'm working.. LOL. =)
it's all a choice i guess.
why choose to feel bad/sad?
of cos, there are times that we feel that way inevitably
still, it's a choice of perspective. it's a CHOICE.
thanks for the reminder my fren. =)
Monday, May 11, 2009
Mondays are really BLUE..
sch frm 9am - 7pm is seriously no joke.
so mentally draining..
well, at least CSAS pres is done.
things left for tis wk are,
tutorials.
that TE qns which i'm totally clueless abt.
CSAS pract papers by thurs.
RTecB Lec quiz on thurs.
BPT tut quiz on fri.
long long days ahead.. LOL.
even though time seems to pass crazily fast.
*********************************
many many prayers for OSIP!
really hope that all goes well =)
*********************************
Change is the only constant indeed.
There's really a difference..
i wonder wad's on your mind rite now..
sch frm 9am - 7pm is seriously no joke.
so mentally draining..
well, at least CSAS pres is done.
things left for tis wk are,
tutorials.
that TE qns which i'm totally clueless abt.
CSAS pract papers by thurs.
RTecB Lec quiz on thurs.
BPT tut quiz on fri.
long long days ahead.. LOL.
even though time seems to pass crazily fast.
*********************************
many many prayers for OSIP!
really hope that all goes well =)
*********************************
Change is the only constant indeed.
There's really a difference..
i wonder wad's on your mind rite now..
Sunday, May 10, 2009
9th May 2009.
i'm really happy =D
after a span of approx 5mths, finally able to progress!
to think that the night before, which was friday, i was still hoping.
thoughts that ran across my mind were,
"i can't ask for much right now, just gotta do the best at what i can."
"be content with being able to do the little things, so that others might do the greater."
Thank God.
can't deny that it got disheartening at times
at least it pays to be patient.. haha
and more importantly, it's really a blessing to have ppl who encourage =)
there's really a strength in that.
it would certainly have been more difficult to hang on.
T's really cute! haha..
greedy darling, but very very adorable!
ytd was certainly different, kinda like an assurance to why i made this choice then
no regrets, just living up every moment =)
it really helps to think positively..
like wad a gd fren shared with me on the bus one night,
"when a person has had a competition, don't ask if he/she won or lost.. ask instead, did you do your best?"
"don't ask a person how his/her day was... ask instead, what have you learnt today?"
*****************************************
Asnul asked be to be CF for like nxt mth.. haha
why not?! hahah.. if i'm not otherwise engaged of cos =)
there's really a lot of smiley faces in this post eh? hahaha
today's Nies' Bdae, so Happy Birthday woman!
i'm really happy =D
after a span of approx 5mths, finally able to progress!
to think that the night before, which was friday, i was still hoping.
thoughts that ran across my mind were,
"i can't ask for much right now, just gotta do the best at what i can."
"be content with being able to do the little things, so that others might do the greater."
Thank God.
can't deny that it got disheartening at times
at least it pays to be patient.. haha
and more importantly, it's really a blessing to have ppl who encourage =)
there's really a strength in that.
it would certainly have been more difficult to hang on.
T's really cute! haha..
greedy darling, but very very adorable!
ytd was certainly different, kinda like an assurance to why i made this choice then
no regrets, just living up every moment =)
it really helps to think positively..
like wad a gd fren shared with me on the bus one night,
"when a person has had a competition, don't ask if he/she won or lost.. ask instead, did you do your best?"
"don't ask a person how his/her day was... ask instead, what have you learnt today?"
*****************************************
Asnul asked be to be CF for like nxt mth.. haha
why not?! hahah.. if i'm not otherwise engaged of cos =)
there's really a lot of smiley faces in this post eh? hahaha
today's Nies' Bdae, so Happy Birthday woman!
Thursday, May 07, 2009
after that conversation KK, i really wondered.
is it true?
that i don't trust easily?
maybe. not 100% though.
and yet, he's so sure.
certainly, i admit that i do have doubts at times.
doesn't everyone?
i mean, after seeing what this world can be like (negatively), don't we all become wary?
and yet, why do i get hurt everytime?
don't you have to trust first, to get hurt and disappointed?
or maybe, i'm just too emotional.
i do know that i'm insecure.
but, not to the point where i get agressive and start "attacking" others instead.
i guess, it's a choice whether to trust or not.
i'd choose to trust first.
wadever that may happen in the future, who knows right?
i don't wanna be cynical.
********************************************************
should i take a 2nd one?
just worried if i'd be able to cope.
i don't think i'm prepared to give up the current one.
still considering.. how?
sent out a few requests for OSIP.
praying for replies..
is it true?
that i don't trust easily?
maybe. not 100% though.
and yet, he's so sure.
certainly, i admit that i do have doubts at times.
doesn't everyone?
i mean, after seeing what this world can be like (negatively), don't we all become wary?
and yet, why do i get hurt everytime?
don't you have to trust first, to get hurt and disappointed?
or maybe, i'm just too emotional.
i do know that i'm insecure.
but, not to the point where i get agressive and start "attacking" others instead.
i guess, it's a choice whether to trust or not.
i'd choose to trust first.
wadever that may happen in the future, who knows right?
i don't wanna be cynical.
********************************************************
should i take a 2nd one?
just worried if i'd be able to cope.
i don't think i'm prepared to give up the current one.
still considering.. how?
sent out a few requests for OSIP.
praying for replies..
Tuesday, May 05, 2009
was just reading Danielle's blog..
does friendship really require one to be selfish?
sumtimes, it really seems like that.
at times, i really feel like i'm living a virtual life all together.
well, almost everything revolves around technology these days.
but still, i miss the times of snail mails and letter writing..
not that i actually really do that much
cos most of my pri sch life, it's practically filled with prefects' stuff, bball and studies?
everything was in school. almost.
den came the technology wave in sec sch.
there onwards, it's communications and relationships taken for granted.
after watching The Classic, which almost everything was communicated via snail mail..
there's just this afterthought on the relation btw letter-writing and relationships.
penning thoughts that are pages long,
the heart and effort put into writing the letter, wadever it may contain..
these are the little things that allows a relationship to grow.
it's always the littlest things.
those that people almost always take for granted.
it's the anticipation of receiving the words that feeds the emotions..
and in times like now, this anticipation is replaced by the speed of technology.
the movie was a great recommendation =)
sad, beautiful and romantic are mere words to describe it.
the predictability is there, but still it goes straight to the heart.
for me that is.
i'm a sucker for these.. HA.
i hope.
i wish.
does friendship really require one to be selfish?
sumtimes, it really seems like that.
at times, i really feel like i'm living a virtual life all together.
well, almost everything revolves around technology these days.
but still, i miss the times of snail mails and letter writing..
not that i actually really do that much
cos most of my pri sch life, it's practically filled with prefects' stuff, bball and studies?
everything was in school. almost.
den came the technology wave in sec sch.
there onwards, it's communications and relationships taken for granted.
after watching The Classic, which almost everything was communicated via snail mail..
there's just this afterthought on the relation btw letter-writing and relationships.
penning thoughts that are pages long,
the heart and effort put into writing the letter, wadever it may contain..
these are the little things that allows a relationship to grow.
it's always the littlest things.
those that people almost always take for granted.
it's the anticipation of receiving the words that feeds the emotions..
and in times like now, this anticipation is replaced by the speed of technology.
the movie was a great recommendation =)
sad, beautiful and romantic are mere words to describe it.
the predictability is there, but still it goes straight to the heart.
for me that is.
i'm a sucker for these.. HA.
i hope.
i wish.
Sunday, May 03, 2009
ytd was truely unforgettable.
i'm not sure if exciting's the right word.
but it was definitely adrenalin pumping.
"so happening" some would say.
firstly, i'm glad those were the GSOs working ytd.
Fadli, Nazri, Zul, Salihin and another whose name i din get.
they stayed equally late putting back all the chairs..
and things could have been more difficult without them.
secondly, the guests were understanding
and i suppose we din get much crap as expected.
i think like the whole MM was there man..
except for AS, JL, WL and RF.
whole body's aching now.. with odd bruises here n there. lol
it was really an eye-opener.
i'm not sure if exciting's the right word.
but it was definitely adrenalin pumping.
"so happening" some would say.
firstly, i'm glad those were the GSOs working ytd.
Fadli, Nazri, Zul, Salihin and another whose name i din get.
they stayed equally late putting back all the chairs..
and things could have been more difficult without them.
secondly, the guests were understanding
and i suppose we din get much crap as expected.
i think like the whole MM was there man..
except for AS, JL, WL and RF.
whole body's aching now.. with odd bruises here n there. lol
it was really an eye-opener.
Friday, May 01, 2009
it's frustrating.
really really thought it was over.
don't tell me it's the hormones,
throwing thoughts ard in my head like a lottery wheel.
don't even know why.
don't wanna think abt it.
so conflicting.
wad i hope?
wad i really want?
but yet, i'm resisting?
pride?
i'm laughing at myself.
this is when some ppl just toss their heads back,
take a good look at wad's going on and just laugh at their own silliness.
i guess, i'm more afraid of what i've got to lose
instead of wad might be a minutely possible gain.
wad am i afraid of besides that?
some i possiblely know, some it's still a mystery.
i hate how i let fear take hold.
wad should i do, my fren?
really really thought it was over.
don't tell me it's the hormones,
throwing thoughts ard in my head like a lottery wheel.
don't even know why.
don't wanna think abt it.
so conflicting.
wad i hope?
wad i really want?
but yet, i'm resisting?
pride?
i'm laughing at myself.
this is when some ppl just toss their heads back,
take a good look at wad's going on and just laugh at their own silliness.
i guess, i'm more afraid of what i've got to lose
instead of wad might be a minutely possible gain.
wad am i afraid of besides that?
some i possiblely know, some it's still a mystery.
i hate how i let fear take hold.
wad should i do, my fren?